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Pathological Abuse: The Most Sinister Form of Domestic Abuse

The Aftermath of Pathological Domestic Abuse

Did you know that there is a form of domestic abuse so complex that it often remains undetected and is therefore often mistakenly assumed to be 'ordinary' emotional and mental domestic abuse? This is a reality many victims struggle to recognize before they are deeply caught in a cycle of malicious abuse.

 

Pathological abuse often leaves invisible wounds, making it difficult for both victims and outsiders to understand the seriousness of the situation.

 

Due to FOG (fear, obligation, and guilt) – which clouds judgment – breaking free is thus extremely challenging. Furthermore, the abuse does not end by breaking free from the abusive relationship; survivors often continue to battle long-term consequences throughout their lives.

From General Reality to Personal Experience

This general reality of pathological abuse deeply reflects my own story. Despite a big, beautiful house, a fancy car, and professional success in various international management roles, a harrowing truth lurked behind this façade.

For two decades, I endured the shackles of pathological abuse, entrapped in both emotional and mental captivity by my abuser.

Married to 'The Dark Triad'

My marriage was to a person clinically diagnosed with severe antisocial personality disorder, one who exhibited traits of "The Dark Triad" – primary psychopathy, Machiavellianism, and covert malignant narcissism. This concealed the daily reality of my fear and unrest.

Double Role: Victim and Spouse

The trauma bond uncovered my dual role; I was both the victim and the spouse of a person with a severe personality disorder. My attempts to heal him, overshadowed by a mixture of fear and hope, unintentionally prolonged the period I was subjected to abuse.

A Cult of One

Being in a relationship with a person representing 'The Dark Triad' can almost be likened to being in a cult led by one person. The grooming process and programming I experienced were intense and systematic, much like the methods used in cult-like situations. This manipulation gradually changed my perception of reality and left me with aftereffects that are (and continue to be) difficult to overcome, even long after the relationship ended.

He Literally Silenced Me

Pathological abuse inflicts more than just emotional and mental wounds; it has the capacity to alter brain chemistry, reshaping the way survivors perceive and interact with the world, and can also lead to direct physical disorders.

 

This form of abuse not only dramatically affected my mental health but also resulted in a severe physical disorder. The prolonged trauma he inflicted evolved into a neurological disorder that manifested in the form of vocal spasms, profoundly silencing me.

 

This voice disorder is so severe that it requires regular surgeries, four times a year, for the rest of my life, and presents significant challenges with my vocal cords.

As a further consequence of the intense abuse, I developed complex PTSD. Now, as I adapt to life with these extensive challenges, I continue to fight against the ongoing psychological and physical aftereffects.

From Silence to Strength

Despite the traumatic impact, I choose to speak out. My commitment and this website aim to enlighten others about pathological abuse, provide support, and strive for the recognition and support that survivors rightfully deserve.

Marginalization of Pathological Abuse

As a spokesperson, I emphasize the need for societal and legal recognition of pathological abuse as a distinct and severe form of domestic abuse. Educating the public and establishing comprehensive support systems are crucial to ensuring justice for survivors.

 

This can only be achieved by exposing pathological abusers, their tactics, strategies, and the destruction they cause. The evidence of their abuse often lies in the invisible wounds and aftermath that survivors confront.

Cindy Ann Pedersen

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